Erotic romance with an edge.
I like the second(longer version} betterKelly
I agree, I like the second version better as well. It makes me want those first three chapters.
The longer one gave me enough details that I wanted to see the first 3 chapters. The first one was too generic -- it didn't give me enough detail to make me interested in the story. Do you have to describe the woman as beautiful? It seemed redundant. Of course, I don't write, so maybe you need the adjective for the heroine. Ann
ditto to all the above. Longer one works.
Thank you all. Zinreads, good point. Now I have to work on the longer one. I don't like how it sounds yet, the words need to change a bit.
Longer one, definitely. I want it now. Forget the first three chapters. All of it. Jennifer K. ;)
WOOHOO, an acceptance of my query letter already!! Thank you Jennifer! LOL
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